You're not making it weird—your caretakers really sucked, huh?
[ Mako has to reassure him, reaching up to slide fingers up along Wu's face, making him look at Mako again. He had known, kind of, the way Wu thought about him, but this is new a little breathtaking, especially coming from Wu with his bright green eyes and his soft hair. He wouldn't have thought that Wu was anything close to his type until the realization of him had slammed into Mako like a train, making clear that yes, actually, he was very into all that soft skin and the way Wu fits against him.
It wasn't actually a fast realization. He'd been faced with the sweep of Wu's back a hundred times in their suite, had watched him pad from shower to bedroom, chattering about something Mako could barely pay attention to because he was caught on some water drop clinging to Wu's shoulderblade, wondering why he was staring so much, thinking that he shouldn't be. He'd known Wu was attractive. How could he not? Wu's a hard thing to not notice. It was what all those little moments—watching his long fingers curve around chopsticks, the way streetlights haloed him in gold—actually added up to that Mako had missed. He hadn't seen the larger thing for what it was, hadn't fitted all the pieces together until the pool, and Wu, up close and damp and wanting. ]
[ Wu's breath catches, meeting his eyes and feeling caught there. Mako really thought that, all that time? He had no idea, had no idea that Mako thought about him, even during those years in the suite. Wu definitely thought about him, too. Didn't quite know that he was in love with him, but the signs were there. He wanted to be around Mako all the time, wanted to impress him, wanted Mako to pay attention to him. Those things haven't really gone away, they've just changed, morphed into something healthier, wanting to make Mako happy, wanting to make sure that Wu is giving him what he needs.
But in the pool... Wu remembers that, too. Remembers it differently. He remembers wanting Mako so, so badly. He remembers wondering if Mako knows, if he's sending the wrong messages, if Wu is going to make it awful and awkward between them because he likes Mako so, so much, but he doesn't want to lose Mako. He never wants to lose him. Mako is so important to him, the one person who stuck by him, the one person who bothered to get to know him, the one person who wanted to protect him. Even if he was paid to do it, it still matters to him. It still matters that Mako was there. It matters that Mako cared.
He doesn't remember to reply out loud, and instead his eyes drop to Mako's lips, drawn in and warm and feeling so wrapped up in Mako, so in love with him that it eclipses everything else sometimes. ]
Mako knows that, in his head: knows how lonely he was, knows how few people in the world cared about him, but it hits him now harder than it has before because he's getting all that loneliness and all those thoughts at once, and it's—
It's enough to make him reach up, sliding his thumb along Wu's cheek. If Mako has anything to say about it, Wu's never going to feel again like someone only cares about him because they have to. He's not going to let Wu feel that alone. ]
[ Tears well up in Wu's eyes. Hearing that from Mako's own mind, not filtered through what he thinks he should say, not said into the air but right into Wu's heart, it's everything he's ever wanted to hear. He can't help a watery smile before he's kissing Mako because he loves him, he loves Mako and he wants to make sure that Mako has a life he's proud of, a life that lets him do the things he loves, a life where he's safe and loved and surrounded by people who care about him.
Wu wants him to have that. He wants be the one to give Mako that. He wants to be with Mako until they're old and grey ]
[ Mako mumbles, mostly because there is so much feeling swelling between the two of them and it's kind of a lot, it makes him feel too big and too warm with it. He doesn't know what to do with all of this love and care: how does he hold it? Where does it go? ]
[ It flows between them, a swell and a pull and Wu leans in against him and he's sure. He's sure that he wants this. He wants to marry Mako, he wants to share Mako's thoughts, he wants to share everything with him. ]
[ A silly thing to be focusing on when he can also hear the stream of Wu's thoughts, when all he wants to do is throw himself into them and let himself be carried along. He likes Wu's thoughts, is the thing. Hearing them isn't new because Wu gives voice to them so fluidly, and they're a comforting thing to tune into. They aren't in the background like they used to be. In their suite Mako would let Wu's words wash up over his toes like the waves of Yue Bay rinsing dirty feet, a balm after a long day. Now he sits and he listens, watches the way Wu's eyes crinkle up when he smiles and the flash of white teeth, lets himself get caught up in the nooks and crannies and tide pools of his day and his opinions about it. ]
[ They don't talk about that all that much, do they? Those three years in the suite seem so far away now, two worlds ago, a different life, a different them. Wu, so wrapped up in himself, in his position, in trying to make the best of a bad situation, bringing Mako along for the ride even if he didn't want to be there.
Who would have thought they'd be here, now? Sitting on a frigid beach in a different world, seeing more deeply into the other than either of them probably thought possible, sharing something so intimate, taking such a big step. ]
Seriously.
[ It's almost silly to try and keep this conversation up while thinking so many different things, seeing them reflected back from Mako's mind. He pushes some of Mako's too-long hair back from his face ]
You know, you have to get a haircut before the wedding.
[ Mako snorts, warm and amused and full of love, and turns to press a kiss to the soft skin of Wu's wrist. A year ago, he would've insisted his hair was fine, gotten weird about the word wedding. A year ago the tiny voice in him terrified of anything going well, sure that it was all going to be ripped away would have spiked up in alarm, sent warnings flaring through his body.
Today, he lets his eyes flutter closed, enjoying the closeness of Wu. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ Mako has to reassure him, reaching up to slide fingers up along Wu's face, making him look at Mako again. He had known, kind of, the way Wu thought about him, but this is new a little breathtaking, especially coming from Wu with his bright green eyes and his soft hair. He wouldn't have thought that Wu was anything close to his type until the realization of him had slammed into Mako like a train, making clear that yes, actually, he was very into all that soft skin and the way Wu fits against him.
It wasn't actually a fast realization. He'd been faced with the sweep of Wu's back a hundred times in their suite, had watched him pad from shower to bedroom, chattering about something Mako could barely pay attention to because he was caught on some water drop clinging to Wu's shoulderblade, wondering why he was staring so much, thinking that he shouldn't be. He'd known Wu was attractive. How could he not? Wu's a hard thing to not notice. It was what all those little moments—watching his long fingers curve around chopsticks, the way streetlights haloed him in gold—actually added up to that Mako had missed. He hadn't seen the larger thing for what it was, hadn't fitted all the pieces together until the pool, and Wu, up close and damp and wanting. ]
no subject
But in the pool... Wu remembers that, too. Remembers it differently. He remembers wanting Mako so, so badly. He remembers wondering if Mako knows, if he's sending the wrong messages, if Wu is going to make it awful and awkward between them because he likes Mako so, so much, but he doesn't want to lose Mako. He never wants to lose him. Mako is so important to him, the one person who stuck by him, the one person who bothered to get to know him, the one person who wanted to protect him. Even if he was paid to do it, it still matters to him. It still matters that Mako was there. It matters that Mako cared.
He doesn't remember to reply out loud, and instead his eyes drop to Mako's lips, drawn in and warm and feeling so wrapped up in Mako, so in love with him that it eclipses everything else sometimes. ]
no subject
Mako knows that, in his head: knows how lonely he was, knows how few people in the world cared about him, but it hits him now harder than it has before because he's getting all that loneliness and all those thoughts at once, and it's—
It's enough to make him reach up, sliding his thumb along Wu's cheek. If Mako has anything to say about it, Wu's never going to feel again like someone only cares about him because they have to. He's not going to let Wu feel that alone. ]
no subject
Wu wants him to have that. He wants be the one to give Mako that. He wants to be with Mako until they're old and grey ]
no subject
[ Mako mumbles, mostly because there is so much feeling swelling between the two of them and it's kind of a lot, it makes him feel too big and too warm with it. He doesn't know what to do with all of this love and care: how does he hold it? Where does it go? ]
no subject
You'd look cute grey.
no subject
[ A silly thing to be focusing on when he can also hear the stream of Wu's thoughts, when all he wants to do is throw himself into them and let himself be carried along. He likes Wu's thoughts, is the thing. Hearing them isn't new because Wu gives voice to them so fluidly, and they're a comforting thing to tune into. They aren't in the background like they used to be. In their suite Mako would let Wu's words wash up over his toes like the waves of Yue Bay rinsing dirty feet, a balm after a long day. Now he sits and he listens, watches the way Wu's eyes crinkle up when he smiles and the flash of white teeth, lets himself get caught up in the nooks and crannies and tide pools of his day and his opinions about it. ]
no subject
Who would have thought they'd be here, now? Sitting on a frigid beach in a different world, seeing more deeply into the other than either of them probably thought possible, sharing something so intimate, taking such a big step. ]
Seriously.
[ It's almost silly to try and keep this conversation up while thinking so many different things, seeing them reflected back from Mako's mind. He pushes some of Mako's too-long hair back from his face ]
You know, you have to get a haircut before the wedding.
no subject
Today, he lets his eyes flutter closed, enjoying the closeness of Wu. ]
Yeah, I know.