[ Each of the comments from his family, enemies, citizens, friends, beats Wu down further. He wishes he didn't believe them, wishes that he didn't have to feel like this, but it's difficult to think anything else when your whole life, you were only worthwhile because of how you were born. Nothing else mattered, nothing else was good enough.
He thinks it's over, the silence a welcome relief from each new comment, each new person turning on him.
Until Sam's voice breaks out over that silence. Wu's hands grip the podium too tightly and his eyes search the crowd until they land on him, standing there, looking the same as he did when he killed Wu, the same way he did when he broke Wu's arm.
It's a dream, Wu reminds himself. It's a dream. Sam is just one of the mass of people, the people who hate him here. ]
No. No, no, no.
[ He closes his eyes, willing his dream to take Sam away. ]
[He watches Wu closing his eyes, trying to hide away from what's right in front of him; it doesn't do him any good, of course. But by all means, he can try. Lucifer waits patiently, arms folded.]
You know I'm not a figment of your imagination, right?
I'm just well-versed in dream-walking. What better way to check in on one of my first kills in this town?
[ Well, he's never been very good at lucid dreaming, anyway.
Wu peers out from between his fingers and he's still there. Dreamwalking. He's never heard of that before, but that could be what Mako said about seeing Sam in his dreams. Great, he has to hide from Sam when he's awake and when he's asleep, now.
It takes him another moment to find his voice. ]
I'm fine.
[ His voice is more confident than he feels. Even after the beat down of all the people he loves telling him he's worthless, knowing that this is a dream lets him better push that off. He knows he's loved. He has to believe that he is. ]
[ Wu takes a breath, staring at the podium. It swims in front of him and turns into Grandma Yin again, intoning: ]
Long live the King!
[ Wu yelps and stumbles back, falling to the ground. The podium and City Hall swirl around them, more people showing up around Wu, saying more awful things to him, like Sam saying that reminded his mind to start up again. Familiar faces from Deerington are there, now. Chuck and Raleigh and Lysithea and Ruby and Shiro, all of Wu's friends, saying awful things to him. ]
I'm fine! This isn't real! I'm, I'm, I'm--
[ It's hard to hold onto that when everyone who loves him is telling him awful things, and the one person who truly scares him is just standing there, observing. ]
Make it stop!
[ Will that work? He doesn't know. But he can try. He's still a King, after all. People tend to do things when he tells them to. ]
[Lucifer moves in the blink of an eye from the crowd to the podium, standing beside Wu with his hands in his jacket pockets.]
Do you hear yourself? You're begging for your own mind to listen to you. How are you supposed to rule a people if you can't even get your dreams to obey you?
[He bites his lip, and says, rather innocently:]
If you'd like, I could make them stop? Here.
[In a very kind gesture, he lifts one hand and snaps his fingers.
Chuck and Raleigh and Mako explode into a mess of blood and bone and innards.
Sorry if some of it gets on you, little prince. You should invest some plexiglass shielding.]
[ Wu's not sure if he's ever been more shocked. Everything seems to stop. He isn't really in his body, even thought this is a dream. It's like he's watching it from above.
He is. He's looking down at himself, his own body, covered in the gore of his best friends, the people he loves most in this crazy town, and the man who killed him did that. He did that, and he's telling Wu that he doesn't know what he's doing. Of course he doesn't! He doesn't know. He doesn't know he's doing or how to lead or if he's making the right decisions.
He does know that Sam is a bad person. He isn't bad like Zaheer was bad. Zaheer had a goal, at least. A philosophy. Sam has none of that, that Wu can see. He just wants to hurt, to kill, to traumatize.
These thoughts tick through Wu's head as he stares at himself, at his own body, cowering there. He doesn't feel pity or embarrassment. He doesn't even really feel anger. He simply feels sad. He feels sad for himself. He feels sad for Sam.
Slowly this other, ghostly version of himself turns to look at Sam, contemplating him. He just looks like a man. A plain, normal man. ]
I don't want to be obeyed. I just want to be happy.
[ It's true. A raw truth, one that comes out easily in this dream state. ]
His brow furrows as he looks at Wu with a sort of thoughtfulness, like he's... trying to decide an appropriate answer.]
When you spend a life all but abandoned by your father, betrayed by those you thought cared about you — when your own brother sends you away, and you're made out to be nothing but a monster... Well. Let's just say I'm not entirely the way I am by choice. Happiness has hardly been on the forefront of my mind, in all these years.
[And that's why he offers Sam even a modicum of his pity, of his love and care. Because Sam Winchester is a reflection of him; they understand each other, even when Sam vehemently denies it. He's protecting Sam in his own way. He just doesn't see it yet, but he will, once Lucifer returns them home and reminds Sam where he'll be safest.
But Lucifer — is also a selfish narcissist, who has blamed everyone but himself for where he is.
Maybe it is wise, to be sad for him, when he says with venom in his words:]
I don't want to be happy. I just want to be obeyed.
[Sam Winchester and Lucifer are nothing alike, not really.
But he will more than happily bring Sam down with him to pretend they are.]
[After a moment, though, a small, monstrous smile pulls at his lips.
One that says it really doesn't matter what the man's reasoning is, in the end.]
I do have to admit, though...
There's something soothing about the sound of a human being bursting like a bubble in your hands.
Don't you think?
[He holds up his fingers — and snaps, leaving Wu's dream to burst. And most importantly, giving Wu no chance to keep poking at what lies underneath. He despises that sort of topic.]
[ Wu would have responded, given the chance. That sounds familiar. Not the same, but familiar. That's why he wants to be happy: he never was. No one ever loved him, no one cared for him beyond his station. No one cared if he was anything but alive and present and acting the way he was supposed to, as a prince. And he wasn't very good at that, either.
But on the other hand, he sounds a lot like Auntie. Unable to be reasoned with, never thinking that she's wrong, so sure that her choices are right by law, by the fact that she was the Queen.
Wu wants to be nothing like her.
There's certainly nothing soothing about the other him, still covered in his friends' gore. It's a relief when Sam bursts the dream and Wu wakes up with a start. He's drenched, shivering, feverish. Mako is next to him, warm and asleep and alive. That helps. That helps, even if Wu doesn't want to go back to sleep, now. He pulls his knees into his chest, looking down at Fritter, who was asleep at the end of the bed, but woke up with him. She pads over to him and he smiles. At least Fritter has nothing bad to say about him.
Petting her soothes him, helps him, not forget, but think about other things, at least for now. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
He thinks it's over, the silence a welcome relief from each new comment, each new person turning on him.
Until Sam's voice breaks out over that silence. Wu's hands grip the podium too tightly and his eyes search the crowd until they land on him, standing there, looking the same as he did when he killed Wu, the same way he did when he broke Wu's arm.
It's a dream, Wu reminds himself. It's a dream. Sam is just one of the mass of people, the people who hate him here. ]
No. No, no, no.
[ He closes his eyes, willing his dream to take Sam away. ]
no subject
[He watches Wu closing his eyes, trying to hide away from what's right in front of him; it doesn't do him any good, of course. But by all means, he can try. Lucifer waits patiently, arms folded.]
You know I'm not a figment of your imagination, right?
I'm just well-versed in dream-walking. What better way to check in on one of my first kills in this town?
no subject
Wu peers out from between his fingers and he's still there. Dreamwalking. He's never heard of that before, but that could be what Mako said about seeing Sam in his dreams. Great, he has to hide from Sam when he's awake and when he's asleep, now.
It takes him another moment to find his voice. ]
I'm fine.
[ His voice is more confident than he feels. Even after the beat down of all the people he loves telling him he's worthless, knowing that this is a dream lets him better push that off. He knows he's loved. He has to believe that he is. ]
no subject
It doesn't seem very 'fine' to me.
[He's just enjoying himself, really. Passing the time with harassment. As one does.]
no subject
Long live the King!
[ Wu yelps and stumbles back, falling to the ground. The podium and City Hall swirl around them, more people showing up around Wu, saying more awful things to him, like Sam saying that reminded his mind to start up again. Familiar faces from Deerington are there, now. Chuck and Raleigh and Lysithea and Ruby and Shiro, all of Wu's friends, saying awful things to him. ]
I'm fine! This isn't real! I'm, I'm, I'm--
[ It's hard to hold onto that when everyone who loves him is telling him awful things, and the one person who truly scares him is just standing there, observing. ]
Make it stop!
[ Will that work? He doesn't know. But he can try. He's still a King, after all. People tend to do things when he tells them to. ]
cw: quick, explody gore
Do you hear yourself? You're begging for your own mind to listen to you. How are you supposed to rule a people if you can't even get your dreams to obey you?
[He bites his lip, and says, rather innocently:]
If you'd like, I could make them stop? Here.
[In a very kind gesture, he lifts one hand and snaps his fingers.
Chuck and Raleigh and Mako explode into a mess of blood and bone and innards.
Sorry if some of it gets on you, little prince. You should invest some plexiglass shielding.]
no subject
He is. He's looking down at himself, his own body, covered in the gore of his best friends, the people he loves most in this crazy town, and the man who killed him did that. He did that, and he's telling Wu that he doesn't know what he's doing. Of course he doesn't! He doesn't know. He doesn't know he's doing or how to lead or if he's making the right decisions.
He does know that Sam is a bad person. He isn't bad like Zaheer was bad. Zaheer had a goal, at least. A philosophy. Sam has none of that, that Wu can see. He just wants to hurt, to kill, to traumatize.
These thoughts tick through Wu's head as he stares at himself, at his own body, cowering there. He doesn't feel pity or embarrassment. He doesn't even really feel anger. He simply feels sad. He feels sad for himself. He feels sad for Sam.
Slowly this other, ghostly version of himself turns to look at Sam, contemplating him. He just looks like a man. A plain, normal man. ]
I don't want to be obeyed. I just want to be happy.
[ It's true. A raw truth, one that comes out easily in this dream state. ]
Does this really make you happy?
1/2
His brow furrows as he looks at Wu with a sort of thoughtfulness, like he's... trying to decide an appropriate answer.]
When you spend a life all but abandoned by your father, betrayed by those you thought cared about you — when your own brother sends you away, and you're made out to be nothing but a monster... Well. Let's just say I'm not entirely the way I am by choice. Happiness has hardly been on the forefront of my mind, in all these years.
[And that's why he offers Sam even a modicum of his pity, of his love and care. Because Sam Winchester is a reflection of him; they understand each other, even when Sam vehemently denies it. He's protecting Sam in his own way. He just doesn't see it yet, but he will, once Lucifer returns them home and reminds Sam where he'll be safest.
But Lucifer — is also a selfish narcissist, who has blamed everyone but himself for where he is.
Maybe it is wise, to be sad for him, when he says with venom in his words:]
I don't want to be happy. I just want to be obeyed.
[Sam Winchester and Lucifer are nothing alike, not really.
But he will more than happily bring Sam down with him to pretend they are.]
no subject
One that says it really doesn't matter what the man's reasoning is, in the end.]
I do have to admit, though...
There's something soothing about the sound of a human being bursting like a bubble in your hands.
Don't you think?
[He holds up his fingers — and snaps, leaving Wu's dream to burst. And most importantly, giving Wu no chance to keep poking at what lies underneath. He despises that sort of topic.]
no subject
But on the other hand, he sounds a lot like Auntie. Unable to be reasoned with, never thinking that she's wrong, so sure that her choices are right by law, by the fact that she was the Queen.
Wu wants to be nothing like her.
There's certainly nothing soothing about the other him, still covered in his friends' gore. It's a relief when Sam bursts the dream and Wu wakes up with a start. He's drenched, shivering, feverish. Mako is next to him, warm and asleep and alive. That helps. That helps, even if Wu doesn't want to go back to sleep, now. He pulls his knees into his chest, looking down at Fritter, who was asleep at the end of the bed, but woke up with him. She pads over to him and he smiles. At least Fritter has nothing bad to say about him.
Petting her soothes him, helps him, not forget, but think about other things, at least for now. ]